badly_knitted (badly_knitted) wrote,

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Ficlet: Cramped

Title: Cramped
Author: badly_knitted
Characters: Ianto, Owen, Jack, Tosh, Gwen.
Rating: PG
Spoilers: Nada
Summary: Team Torchwood are worn out after a hard day, but the only place to sit is a bit crowded.
Word Count: 500
Written For: Prompt 72: Drain at anythingdrabble.
Disclaimer: I don’t own Torchwood, or the characters.

“That’s another day down the drain. Literally,” Ianto groaned. Team Torchwood had spent the last several hours trawling through Cardiff’s sewers, risking life and limb at the claws of the resident Weevils, all to retrieve something even Jack said wasn’t worth finding.

“Ugh, I’ve had it! I think this is what’s called being drained.” Owen’s pun drew a few tired sniggers from the rest of the team as, clutching the bottle of beer he’d fetched from the fridge, he flopped heavily onto the end of the battered old sofa, almost dislodging some of its other occupants.

“Find somewhere else to sit,” Tosh grumbled, for once not pleased at having Owen squashed against her. “There’s no room on here.”

“There’s nowhere else comfy to sit,” Owen grouched back.

“I wouldn’t call this comfy,” Ianto replied from the other end of the sofa. “It’s cramped and lumpy, and if anyone moves I’ll fall off.” Which, when he came to think of it, was a lot like nights in Jack’s cot.

“You could sit on my lap,” Jack offered.

“I might take you up on that, only I’m too tired to move.”

“We should get a bigger sofa,” Tosh said. “This one was fine when there were only four of us, but it’s too small for five.”

“Mm,” Jack agreed. “Still waiting for another one to fall through the Rift though.”

“There’re places these days called shops where you can buy all kinds of furniture, you know,” Ianto teased his lover. “They’ll deliver it and everything.”

Jack gave Ianto a withering look. “Funny.”

“Seriously?” Gwen, crammed in the middle, turned to Jack. “It came through the Rift?”

Owen lifted his head wearily off the back of the sofa. “Course it did. You don’t think anyone would actually buy anything as ugly and lumpy as this on purpose, do you?”

“Why buy when you can get something for free? Gerald always said buying furniture was an unnecessary drain on resources considering how many perfectly usable items were already in storage. Besides, there’s nothing wrong with this sofa. You should’ve seen what we had to sit on before we got it. Wooden bench, no upholstery; old church pew or something.”

“What happened to it? Just out of curiosity.” Ianto liked old things and a bench like that might make a good garden seat.

“Woodworm. Had to throw it in the furnace.”


“I was happy to see it go,” Jack admitted. “Smashed it to pieces myself, very satisfying. Not that it took much effort. Practically fell apart.”

“This sofa’s about ready for the same treatment.” Owen took a swig of his beer.

“No!” Jack glared past the two girls at the team medic. “It just needs reupholstering, that’s all.”

“And what d’you propose we sit on while that’s done; our thumbs?” Ianto raised an eyebrow. “Anyway, if you’re worried about a drain on resources, a new sofa would cost less.”

“Fine, we’ll get a new one. Happy now?”


“But we’re still keeping this one.”

The End

Tags: anythingdrabble, fic, fic: one-shot, fic: pg, ficlet, gwen cooper, ianto jones, jack harkness, jack/ianto, owen harper, torchwood fic, toshiko sato

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