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December 2023



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Drabble: Weirdest Foods

Title: Weirdest Foods

Author: badly_knitted

Characters: Gwen, Owen, Tosh, Ianto, Jack

Rating: G

Written For: Challenge 299 – Green Eggs and Ham at tw100

Spoilers: Slight for Fragments.

Summary: “What’s the weirdest thing you’ve eaten?”

Disclaimer: I don’t own Torchwood, or the characters.

Gwen had suggested another team bonding game.

“What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever eaten? I’ve tried octopus. It was… rubbery.”

“I’ve had Rocky Mountain Oysters,” admitted Owen.

“What’s odd about oysters?” Gwen wondered.

“They’re not actual oysters, they’re deep fried bull testicles.”

“Oh. YUK!”

Owen sniggered.


“Roasted tarantula. It was good, quite crispy. What about you, Ianto?”

“Alligator. Tastes like chicken. Oh, and Witchetty Grubs.”

Looking disgusted, Gwen turned to Jack.

“I’m almost afraid to ask!”

“Dinosaur. No idea what kind though, they were pretty much pre-cooked after the asteroid hit.”

Ianto rolled his eyes.

“Should’ve guessed you’d win!”

The End


Lol of course Jack would win!
Gwen's seems quite tame comparatively.

I'm not very adventurous with my food. Have you eaten anything weird?
I wanted Gwen's idea of strange food to be comparatively tame so she would be more shockeed by everyone else.

I really thought someone else would have used Jack's comment from Fragments about dinosaurs ("Had 'em for breakfast"), but no one did so I had to do it myself.

I was never adventurous with food and these days my stomach protests at even blsnd food, so no, never had anything strange. Unless you include nasturtium leaves, 'cause I love them. I think you can eat the flowers too, but I haven't tried those, they just seem too insubstantial. Clover flowers are okay but I only sucked them.
just amazing!!!!! Who would be able to beat Jack and dinosaur meat??!!
The rest of the team will never even get the chance to sample dinosaur since they're extinct, so they can't beat jack no matter what. He didn't even need to cheat in order to win this time, lol!

Thank you.

Torchwood personnel are an adventurous bunch, lol!

Thank you.
Of course Jack would win LOL he'd try anything once.

great drabble.
He would, and he's probably tried far stranger things!

Thank you.
*giggles* I don't think anything can beat dinosaur! ;)
Neither do I!

Thank you.
Ew! LOL!

Of course Jack would win!
Jack has been everywhere, seen and done so many peculiar things, that sometimes he doesn't even need to cheat in order to win!

Thank you.
Not surprised Jack would win - I don't even want to think about what else he has eaten on different planets. This reminded me of the scene from Indiana Jones and The Temple of Doom where they are all eating monkey brains.
Heehee! Yes, I only saw that again a few weeks ago so it was very much still in my mind.

I did think of trying to write one where they sample alien food, but honestly, just eating some earth dishes is weird enough, lol!

Thank you.
Snerk! Jack really knows how to milk the time travel.
He does. It makes him feel superior to those who live their lines in a rather more linear fashion. ;)

Someone had to use his line from Fragments - I was sure someone else would get there first, but no one did.

Thank you.
there is no comparison! Jack was about to win.
The rest of them didn't stand a chance and for once Jack didn't even need to cheat in order to win!

Thank you.
He cheats, he always cheats. :-p Jack should have been restricted to things available in the last few decades, like the rest of them!

Well, Gwen did say the weirdest thing you've EVER eaten, so Jack was for once being honest - asteroid cooked dinosaur doesn't appear on most menus, strangely enough, lol!

Thank you.