badly_knitted (badly_knitted) wrote,

FAKE Ficlet: Creepy Critter

Title: Creepy Critter
Fandom: FAKE
Author: badly_knitted
Characters: Dee, Ryo
Rating: PG
Setting: After the manga.
Summary: Dee finds Ryo searching his kitchen for an unwanted visitor.
Word Count: 500
Written For: Prompt 549: Past Prompts Revisited #300 ~ #349 at slashthedrabble, using Prompt 324: Creepy-crawlies.
Disclaimer: I don’t own FAKE, or the characters. They belong to the wonderful Sanami Matoh.

When Dee let himself into his lover’s apartment he was greeted by a most appealing sight. Ryo was on hands and knees in the kitchen, tight jeans practically moulded to his ass, t-shirt riding up to expose several inches of pale, flawless skin, head and shoulders crammed inside one of the kitchen cabinets. It was obvious he hadn’t heard Dee enter, because he was muttering to himself in an annoyed tone of voice.

“Dammit, where the hell are you? I know you’re in here somewhere, it’s no good trying to hide from me you little bastard ‘cause I’m gonna find you and then you’re outta here!”

Dee propped his hip against the kitchen table, something Ryo frowned on, and continued to take in the view for a few more minutes before finally asking, “Who’re ya talkin’ to?”

The reaction he got was quite dramatic and he winced, realising he should have gone back to the door and made a noise coming in again; as it was, he all but scared the life out of his lover.

“ARGH!” Ryo yelled jerking back out of the cupboard and banging his head in the process, winding up on his ass on the kitchen floor, a pained expression on his face. “Goddammit, Dee! Are you trying to kill me?”

“Sorry, babe, I just… Sorry. You okay?”

Ryo rubbed his head and scowled up at his partner. “Aside from a headache and almost having a heart attack.” Pulling his hand back he checked his fingers for blood, relieved that there wasn’t any; his thick hair must have provided some protection against the sharp edge of the cabinet.

“You got an uninvited houseguest?” Dee asked.


“You don’t usually crawl around on the kitchen floor with ya head in a cupboard, talkin’ to yourself. You got roaches or somethin’?” Dee hoped not; he hated those things, although if Ryo had to get the place fumigated, he’d need somewhere to stay…

“No, thank God; I have a slug problem. Either that or a snail problem; not sure which since I haven’t seen it yet, but I know it’s here somewhere.”

“Uh, how can ya know if you haven’t seen it?” Sometimes Ryo didn’t make a lot of sense.

Ryo pointed at something on the floor. “It’s leaving incriminating evidence everywhere, and what have I told you about not sitting on the table? We eat off that!”

Dee quickly shifted his butt off the table and sauntered across. “Evidence?”

“Slime trail.” Ryo indicated the silvery traces on the tiled floor. “Whatever it is, it must’ve come with the lettuce I bought yesterday. I need to find it before it leaves slime over all my pots and pans.” He’d have to wash them all anyway, just in case.

Joining his lover on the floor, Dee smiled wryly. “So much for our day off; looks like we’ll be spendin’ it hot on the trail of your mysterious trespasser.” With both of them on the case it didn’t stand a chance.

The End

Tags: dee laytner, fake, fake fic, fic, fic: one-shot, fic: pg, ficlet, ryo maclean, slashthedrabble

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