Characters: OFC, Jack, Ianto.
Written For: Challenge 599: Creep/Creepy at tw100.
Summary: Another civilian needs a friendly dose of Retcon; most humans simply aren’t ready to date aliens.
Disclaimer: I don’t own Torchwood, or the characters.
A/N: Double drabble.
“I thought he was the one!” the girl wails. “He seemed so nice, bringing me chocolates, and flowers, but he’s just like all the others! A total creep!”
Jack listens sympathetically, glancing at Ianto over the girl’s shoulder. Ianto rolls his eyes.
“I mean I could put up with his hairy back and the horribly horny toenails, not like I had to look at ‘em, right? I’m no oil paining myself, even though… He called me beautiful, said he loved me.” The last was spoken in a barely audible whisper. “Everything was going so well.”
“There there,” Jack tries to console her, wishing Gwen were here and not still on her honeymoon.
“Why can’t I ever meet a nice guy like you?” She looked up at Jack from red-rimmed eyes. “Are you available?”
“Sorry, I’m with him.” Jack tilts his chin at Ianto, who hustles forwards to offer the girl a nice cup of tea.
“Here, this will help with the shock.”
“Ta. Typical, isn’t it? All the good ones are taken. I can put up with a lot, but when he took his skin off…”
Ianto nods. “I can see that being a deal breaker. Just forget about him.”