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Ianto Little Smile

August 2019



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Drabble: Creature Feature

Title: Creature Feature

Author: badly_knitted

Characters: Tosh, Ianto, Team

Rating: G

Spoilers: Nada.

Summary: Torchwood never knows what will come through the Rift next…

Disclaimer: I don’t own Torchwood, or the characters.

A/N: For star54kar’s prompt, "It's a one eyed, one horned, flying purple people eater!"

They really should have been accustomed by now to the strange creatures the Rift took pleasure in dumping on an unsuspecting Cardiff.

However, the monstrosity now hovering in front of them had come as something of a surprise.

“It's a one eyed, one horned, flying purple people eater!” Tosh gasped. “Whoever wrote that song must have seen one!”

“Sheb Woolley,” Ianto said distractedly.


“The writer.”


The one eyed, one horned, flying purple creature glared at them.

“I’ll have you know I most certainly do not eat people! That’s slander! I happen to be a vegetarian,” it said huffily.

The End


Of course Ianto knows who wrote the song!
And the ending ... hahahahahahaha

Hilarious and brilliant as usual! :)
Thank you! Yes, when Ianto is thrown off balance by the sight confronting him, his brain goes into its default 'I know everything' mode, lol!

Poor purple veggie eater, people just don't understand it!
OMG and I was fearing messy mission!
It's a very misunderstood alien, poor thing!

Thank you!
I love that a one eyed, one horned flying purple vegetarian came through the rift! I wonder if they all are vegetarians & Sheb Woolley just decided to make the song more exciting?One eyed, one horned flying vegetarian just doesn't have the same ring to it I guess. Great drabble!
Either he got the wrong idea when he saw it, or it was artistic licence since the vegetarian bit isn't exactly thrilling, lol!

Poor alien though, everyomne runs away because they think it will eat them, lol!

Thank you.
I loved that song when I was a kid! Great drabble.
It's such a fun song!

Thank you.
I guess 'one-eyed, one-horned, flying purple vegetable eater' wasn't as catchy!

That was so cute and funny. Well done! :D
Yeah, but unfortunately it's led to an awful lot of misunderstandings, lol!

Thank you!
Hahahah ohh I loved that, "Im a vegetarian" LOLOL

Great drabble.
*grins* Thank you! The alien is rather peeved, it was just looking for a nice salad, lol!

Hehe! Well, that clarified that misconception. Love it.
Thank you!

So many aliens are simply misunderstood, lol!
This just got me in trouble (I'm at work on lunch...). But I love it!
LOL! The critter should find a good lawyer and sue for slander and libel!
A very inventive and wonderful drabble.
:D :D :D
LOL! I'm sure Ianto would be happy to represent it, he could research libel and slander laws quickly, we know he can do anything!

Sorry you got in trouble over it. It's a good thing you weren't reading the one I've just written!
....uh oh....what did you do? I gotta quit reading these at work. They can be so funny that I look like an idiot sometimes grinning but they're so good! :D
Something it embarrassed me a bit to write - don't know when I'll post it though, lol! It's joining the queue with the 80+ others I have written but as yet unposted. I'm currently posting one a day but trying to write at least two because that's the only way I can see me getting enough written to post 250 in one year.

They're not all funny though, I posted a sad one today and I have some serious ones written as well.
I understand; I find your writing though to be very, very good. I usually look to see whatever you post because the drabbles are very enjoyable, even the sad ones. I'm watching some of the reruns on BBCA of Torchwood. It's amazing to see the little things one could miss while watching the show. I'm finding Gwen just as annoying as ever.
I'm glad you're enjoying them all =)

I can't imagine Gwen being anything BUT annoying, lol! I should do some rewatching myself, but I can't find the time.
I admit I really just want to see Jack, Ianto, Tosh and Owen. Gwen comes on and I cringe in how shallow the girl appears to be at times. She just dosen't 'fit' with what the others do and I just don't see how RTD could kill off all of the most useful people and keep her. Jack's team loss is almost mirrored in how his team members have been lost except it kills his spirit, not him.
So true. I always considered Gwen nto be completely pointless, she brought nothing to the team, not even useful skills. Yet she's the one character guaranteed to survive and not lose anything. Talk about unrealistic!
oh my! Lmfao!!!! Perfect!!!
Thank you! I always thought the Purple People Eater was just misunderstood, lol!
Thank you!

Alens must get mis-represented a lot!
I'm late!!
I have lots of nice stories to read.

I start to laugh ..
Ianto knows everything, Ianto sees everything , Ianto ... okay he is omniscient!
It must be for manage Jack!
LOL! I'm sure it does help Ianto to deal with Jack =D

Thank you!