Title: Ianto’s Little Helper - Part 2/2
Characters/Pairing: Jack/Ianto, Tosh, Owen & Gwen
Warnings: Ummm, I wrote it?
Word Count: 2529
Summary: Torchwood gains a new employee.
Disclaimer: I don’t own Torchwood or any of the characters. Which is sad.
When Owen arrived at the Hub an hour later, somewhat hungover, he made his way straight to the kitchen area, hoping for a coffee. What he saw there made his jaw nearly hit the floor. He rubbed his eyes, looked again, then stormed up to Jack’s office.
“Jack, did you turn Teaboy invisible?”
“What are you talking about, Owen,” asked Ianto, “I’m right here.”
Owen spun around and sure enough, there was Ianto, looking perfectly normal, complete with head. Owen scrubbed his face with his hands.
“God, what was I drinking last night?” He sat down heavily on a nearby chair.
Taking pity on Owen in his fragile state, Ianto explained the situation.
“So one of your suits is doing your job all by itself?”
“Yep, that’s about it. Takes a bit of getting used to, but it’s actually rather good having an assistant. Still not sure how it can see to do things though.” Ianto looked thoughtful for a moment then clapped his hands together. “Anyway, I’d better get up to the Tourist Office so I can explain to Gwen when she gets here.”
Before he could move, there was a scream and a loud crash from the main Hub. Ianto winced.
The door burst open and a breathless Gwen rushed in. “Jack, Ianto’s got no head!”
“Sorry about that, Gwen,” Ianto apologized, stepping forward, “I’d hoped to catch you in the Tourist Office, but I got held up.”
Gwen stared at Ianto, then looked down through the windows to where the suit was clearing up everything Gwen had accidentally knocked off her desk, setting things right again. “Would someone mind explaining what the hell’s going on?”
“Well,” said Jack, seems we have a new team member thanks to a very minor mishap with some alien tech. I was thinking of calling him George.”
Ianto raised an eyebrow. “George? Dare I ask why?”
“I like the name, I think it suits him – no pun intended. Can’t keep calling him ‘suit’, can we?”
Gwen stared from one to the other, trying to make sense of what they were saying, until Tosh came into Jack’s office.
“Tosh,” she begged, “can you please explain why there is a complete Ianto in here and a headless Ianto down there?”
Tosh opened her mouth to begin one of her detailed scientific explanations, but Gwen held up a hand to stop her.
“The short version, please?”
“Okay,” Tosh smiled, “short version. Ianto’s suit accidentally came into contact with broken organic alien technology, and has become animated so that the tech can continue to carry out its basic function.”
“Okay,” Gwen said warily, “and what is its basic function?”
“To help,” Tosh shrugged. “It’s perfectly harmless, it just does what it ‘remembers’ Ianto doing. Basic, routine tasks only though, the kind of things Ianto has done hundreds of times. Making coffee, tidying up, filing – that kind of thing.”
Gwen moved closer to the window and stared down at the suit.
“It’s kind of creepy, wandering around without a head. How can it see where it’s going?”
“No idea,” said Jack cheerfully. “Brilliant, isn’t it?”
“It’s bizarre, that’s what it is,” Gwen shot back.
Ianto gave a shrug. “It’s Torchwood. Bizarre is what passes for normal around here,” he added as he headed out of the office to get on with some work.
Gwen could only agree.