Title: Another Day, Another Escape, The Jack’s Ass Remix
Fandom: Stargate SG-1
Characters: Jack O’Neill, Teal’c, Janet Fraizer, Sam Carter
Summary: Jack O’Neill’s day has gone from bad to worse, and then some.
Word Count: 330
Disclaimer: I don’t own Stargate: SG-1, or the characters. They belong to their creators.
This went beyond just plain humiliating, Jack thought to himself from his position lying face down on the cold concrete of the workout area. After managing to give Doc Fraizer the slip and sneak, okay, hobble, out of the infirmary, this had to happen. Why he’d even been cooped up there on account of a twisted ankle was anybody’s guess, there was no justice in the world, but he had a horrible feeling he’d be right back there in short order.
“O’Neill, are you injured?” Teal’c’s deep voice broke through his misery and he groaned feebly in response, all he could manage under the circumstances. He wished the floor would open up and swallow him. His head hurt, must’ve hit it on something when he lost his balance and fell, stupid knee; there were plenty of somethings around, so that was a safe bet. His ass felt uncomfortably draughty too, damned infirmary gowns.
The rest of the world seemed to fade out for a bit; it was almost welcome, except that it meant giving up his escape bid.
Next thing he was aware of was more voices; Fraizer and Carter, oh joy.
“Colonel? Colonel O’Neill? Can you hear me?” Fraizer’s voice sounded too loud.
“I hear you,” he mumbled into the floor.
“Can you tell me what happened?”
“Slipped and my damned knee gave out. Hit my head on… something. Why am I cold?”
“Probably because you lost something when you fell.”
Did Carter have to sound so amused? Jack cracked open one eye and squinted slightly. Carter was holding a torn infirmary gown, which meant… Oh crap. Could this day get any worse?
“Please tell me I’m not naked…”
“Um… I can’t lie to you, Sir.”
Jack groaned again. By now, half the base had probably got an eyeful of his bare ass; they’d be snickering behind his back for weeks. Yep, this was way beyond mere humiliation. He closed his eyes tight.
That said it all really.