badly_knitted (badly_knitted) wrote,

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Ficlet: Arresting Behaviour

Title: Arresting Behaviour
Author: badly_knitted
Characters: Jack, Ianto
Rating: PG-15
Spoilers: Nada.
Summary: Ianto is not happy when Jack gets them both in trouble with the police. Again.
Word Count: 551
Written For: My own prompt ‘Any, any, Arresting Behaviour,’ at [community profile] fic_promptly.
Disclaimer: I don’t own Torchwood, or the characters. They belong to the BBC.

Being arrested was humiliating; Ianto decided he was going to kill Jack the first chance he got. After all, this was all Jack’s fault. It always was.

“We’re going undercover to smoke out the dealer,” he’d told Ianto after it came to Torchwood’s attention that someone was dealing in alien blood that acted on humans as a powerful aphrodisiac. “We’ll let in be known that we’re looking to buy a little something to spice up our love lives, even though we really don’t need that, do we?” He winked at Ianto.

Ianto hadn’t argued; they needed to not only get the stuff off the streets, but find out where the dealer was getting it. The blood needed to be fresh to be useable, which meant there was a good chance the dealer had an alien stashed somewhere and was siphoning its blood off to sell for profit. Ianto wasn’t about to let something like that continue, so he was perfectly willing to participate in the sting, no matter what it took.

He just hadn’t bargained on this.

The sting had gone perfectly, up to a point. The dealer had come to them in the shadows of a crowded club, offering them just what they needed for the wildest night of their lives. Jack had easily put a tracker on the slimeball so that the rest of the team could follow him to his source, but as they’d left the club, some moron had bumped into them, and the little vial of blood had been broken because idiot Jack had still been holding it in his hand.

Ianto had got a few drops of the blood on his arm, quickly absorbed through his skin, but Jack had got almost the whole vial, enough for several doses each, shot straight into his bloodstream when a fragment of the glass vial had cut his palm.

Let’s face it, Jack was a handful at the best of times, but high on an alien aphrodisiac? Before he could move, Ianto found himself shoved up against the nearest wall, clothes being torn off him as Jack set about ravishing him which, due to his own exposure to the substance, Ianto was quite happy to encourage. They’d both been mostly naked, with Jack enthusiastically sucking him off, when the police showed up and arrested them for lewd public behaviour, at which Jack complained, “We weren’t being loud, trust me, we can be a lot louder than that! He hasn’t even started screaming my name yet!”

Forcibly pulled apart and tossed into the backs of two police cars so they couldn’t finish what they’d started, they’d been driven to the nearest police station and thrown in separate detention cells. Now they’d have to spend the whole night locked up, horny and frustrated, with only their own hands for company. It was so unfair!

Yep, when they got out of here Ianto was going to kill Jack, but not until he’d had his way with him. Several times. Slumping onto the cell’s hard bunk, Ianto closed his eyes and conjured up visions of all the things he was going to do to Jack once they were back at the Hub. No doubt Jack was doing the same. Ianto had a feeling it was going to be a very long night.

The End

Tags: fic, fic: one-shot, fic: pg-15, fic_promptly, ficlet, ianto jones, jack harkness, jack/ianto, torchwood fic

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