Title: Resisting Temptation
Characters: Angel, Buffy
Spoilers: General for the first three seasons.
Summary: Angel knows that having a soul doesn’t change what he is.
Word Count: 408
Written For: My own prompt ‘BtVS, Angel/Buffy, Sometimes he longs to sink his teeth into her neck,’ at fic_promptly
Disclaimer: I don’t own BTVS, or the characters. They belong to Joss Whedon.
A vampire with a soul is still a vampire, Angel has the same desires and needs as any other vamp, they’re just balanced out by a conscience and a sense of guilt for all the terrible things he did before his soul was restored.
But he still needs blood to survive, even if these days he mostly satisfies his hunger with pig’s blood from the butcher. It sustains him, but it’s not the same and he knows the craving for human blood will never really go away; he’s merely repressing it.
Most of the time anyway.
There are nights patrolling with Buffy when he looks at her, hair pinned up to keep it out of the way when she’s fighting, the moon streaming down and turning the pale column of her neck to finest alabaster. At moments like that, the desire to sink his fangs into the tender flesh of her throat is almost overwhelming. He knows her blood is pumping through her veins, so close to the surface he can almost smell it, and he yearns for a taste, just a sip. There could surely be nothing more intimate than drinking from someone you love with all your heart and soul.
Nevertheless, he resists the temptation because he knows that a sip would never be enough, he would be compelled to drink and drink, draining her to the point of death, and he’d still want more
His desires are something he does his best to keep to himself, but the demon held captive deep within him knows, and taunts him with dreams and fantasies when he sleeps through the long, hot, California days. He shares his body with a monster and there’s no hiding a single thought from it. The demon urges him to give in, to sample and savour the blood of the Slayer; it’s something few vamps have ever done. Angel blocks it out as best he can, but how long can he keep ignoring a temptation that never goes away? He knows that the man in him is weak, he always was in life and nothing has really changed in all the centuries since his death.
So he makes a vow to protect Buffy however he can, and if the time comes when he has to protect her from himself, then he’ll leave and never look back. He just hopes that if such a day ever comes, he’ll have the strength to walk away.