badly_knitted (badly_knitted) wrote,

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Stargate SG-1 Ficlet: Losing Charlie

Title: Losing Charlie

Fandom: Stargate SG-1

Author: badly_knitted

Characters: Jack O’Neill, mentions Charlie and Sarah.

Rating: PG

Word Count: 275

Spoilers: Yes, although this is set pre-series and even pre-movie. Episode-wise, mostly season one’s ‘Cold Lazurus’

Summary: Jack is guilt-ridden and grieving after the death of his son.

Content Notes: Concerns the death of a child.

Written For: Challenge #152: Shot at fan_flashworks.

Disclaimer: I don’t own Stargate: SG-1, or the characters. They belong to their creators.

Jack felt numb. How many times had he told Charlie that his gun was not a toy, that it was very dangerous and he must never touch it for any reason? He’d thought Charlie understood, that he could trust his boy to do as he was told, but he’d been wrong.

He should have made sure the gun was locked away where Charlie could never find it. Better yet, he should never have had the damned thing in the house in the first place. What had he been thinking? He knew the dangers of guns better than most.

But it was far too late to dwell on what he should and shouldn’t have done, too late to do anything but grieve.

Charlie, his son, his only child, had shot himself with Jack’s own gun. There was no way to go back in time and prevent what had happened, no way to turn back the clock and undo the past. His boy was gone; as little sense as that sentence made in his head, Jack knew it was an unalterable fact.

People were calling it a tragic accident, saying it wasn’t Jack’s fault and that he shouldn’t blame himself, but they were wrong; it was, and he did, and God help him, so did Sarah. How could she not? Charlie was her son too; the loss wasn’t his alone.

In the end, it didn’t matter what anybody told him, or what anyone else thought, because Charlie, his bright, lively little boy, was dead; nothing would ever bring him back, and Jack knew no matter how long he lived, he would never be able to forgive himself.

The End

Tags: angst, fic, fic: one-shot, fic: pg, ficlet, jack o'neill, stargate sg-1

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