Title: Not Now!
Characters: Ianto, Jack. OCs
Summary: Ianto’s in London at a UNIT Conference when he gets a call from Jack.
Word Count: 500
Written For: Prompt #410: Sexting, at slashthedrabble.
Disclaimer: I don’t own Torchwood, or the characters. They belong to the BBC.
UNIT conferences were never the most scintillating affairs, but Ianto always dutifully attended when Torchwood’s presence was requested, because the UNIT bigwigs did occasionally, and probably accidentally, allow small nuggets of useful information to slip out. So, that was where he was now, seated at an impressive table, in an equally impressive conference room in London, bored to tears.
Several of the attending scientists had been arguing about the same piece of mysterious technology for the past two hours, and they were all completely wrong about everything. Ianto could have set them straight, but naturally nobody had asked him, and he wasn’t about to volunteer the information. It was doubtful that they’d believe it was merely the alien equivalent of a kettle even if he told them, since they were firmly convinced it was some kind of advanced weaponry.
His mind was drifting, idly wondering when, and indeed if, the meeting would break for dinner, when he felt his mobile start to vibrate. Surreptitiously sliding it out of his pocket, he opened the incoming text. Unsurprisingly, it was from Jack.
‘R u nekkid?’
Ianto didn’t know whether to laugh or roll his eyes. Trust Jack to open with a comment like that! Then again, it was getting on nine at night, so he could be excused for assuming that Ianto would be in his room at the hotel by now.
‘No, I’m fully dressed,’ he texted back.
The reply was almost instantaneous: =(
A moment passed, and then another text: ‘Y?’
‘Still in a meeting,’ Ianto responded.
‘Oh. Wanna know what I’m wearing?’
‘No.’ That wasn’t strictly true, although Ianto was pretty sure the answer would be ‘nothing.’ It was just that he had no intention of getting dragged into sexting while he was surrounded by a bunch of humourless UNIT officers and scientists.
‘U r no fun.’
‘Neither is this meeting.’
‘I’ll make it better?’
‘Waiting won’t kill you.’
‘Join the club. Talk to you later, Jack.’ Ianto turned his phone off and put it away, turning his attention back to proceedings and trying to concentrate, but the scientists were still arguing.
The so-called conference continued to drag on, until somewhere close to ten at night, Ianto finally ran out of patience.
“Okay, that’s enough. I’m tired, the swill you call coffee is undrinkable, I haven’t eaten since breakfast, and that mysterious new weapon you’re arguing over is a Thalaxian kettle.” He snatched the device from one of the scientists, turned it on, adjusted the temperature control, and dipped it in his cup of cold coffee, instantly heating it. “See? Now, I’m going to get something to eat and go to my room. Perhaps in the morning we can turn our attention to something of actual importance?” With that, he strode from the room, calling room service to order a meal. He was going to have a quick shower, eat a nice dinner, and then return Jack’s call. This time he would definitely be nekkid!