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Ianto Little Smile

August 2019



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Dee & Ryo

FAKE Ficlet: Speed Demon

Title: Speed Demon
Fandom: FAKE
Author: badly_knitted
Characters: Ryo, Dee, Bikky.
Rating: G
Setting: After Vol. 7.
Summary: Bikky’s in serious trouble and Ryo is definitely not pleased.
Word Count: 423
Written For: My own prompt ‘Any, any, breaking the speed limit - on rollerblades,’ at [community profile] fic_promptly.
Disclaimer: I don’t own FAKE, or the characters. They belong to the wonderful Sanami Matoh.

When Ryo arrived back at work after being called out to Bikky’s school, he clearly was not in a good mood. He hung his coat on the rack, stalked over to his desk, and slumped into his chair, frowning.

“So what did the house ape do now?” Dee asked. “Get into a fight? Steal someone’s lunch money? Cheat on a test?” He sat back in his chair, picking up his coffee mug and watching Ryo curiously as his partner flushed red, although whether from anger or embarrassment, Dee couldn’t tell.

“No, nothing like that.”

“So what then?”

“He got a speeding ticket, if you must know.”

“What?” Dee spluttered, choking on the mouthful of coffee he’d just taken. “He doesn’t even have a learner’s permit yet! What’d he do, steal a car? It wasn’t yours, was it? No, couldn’t have been, you drove in this morning…” Dee trailed off as Ryo’s flush deepened and he started chewing on his bottom lip. “Okay, c’mon bud, spill before ya explode.”

“…” Ryo muttered inaudibly.

“Sorry, you’ll have to speak up, I didn’t catch that.”

“I said he was on rollerblades!”

Dee’s eyebrows shot up so high they vanished beneath the hair that flopped casually across his forehead. “Rollerbades? Seriously?” Ryo nodded and Dee started to laugh, shoulders shaking. “Pulled over for speeding on rollerblades, that’s…” He couldn’t continue, he was laughing too much.

“It’s not funny, Dee! I had to pay his fine! It’ll be coming out of his allowance though,” Ryo added darkly, “and I’ve confiscated his blades.”

“Oh c’mon, bud, lighten up! Sure, he shouldn’ta done in, and I really wanna know how he got up that kinda speed, but you have to see the funny side. I mean can you imagine the looks on the faces of the guys who had to pull him over?”

Ryo’s lips twitched. When Dee put it like that, it was kinda funny. He chuckled ruefully. “Okay, so it is a little funny, but he’s still grounded. He could have been seriously hurt!”

“Bikky? Nah, kid’s like a rubber ball, he’d just bounce; he’s got more lives than a cat.”

“You should know,” Ryo teased. “You’re just as bad.”

“Just wait until he gets his learner’s permit.”

“Don’t even joke about that!” Ryo sounded horrified. “After this stunt, he’s not getting behind the wheel of a car until he’s at least thirty!”

“Good luck with that; he starts driver’s ed next year, doesn’t he?”

Ryo put his head in his hands. “Thanks for reminding me. We’re doomed.”

The End


Oh, dear God! *cringes at the thought* If that kid can break the speed limit on roller blades, I don't want to know what he'd do with a car!
Hopefully he'll learn from this experience and be more sensible - he was running late for school, probably latched onto a passing car... ;)

Thank you!
It HAD to happen sometime ;)

Thank you!
*laughs* Leave it to Bikky to get a speeding ticket on rollerblades. I'm with Dee on this one, it's hysterical.
I think Ryo couldn't get it out of his head that Bikky could have been badly hurt going at that kind of speed. It is funny though =)