Characters: Ryo, Dee
Setting: Towards the end of the manga.
Summary: Ryo wonders why he’s still insisting he’s straight when both he and Dee know it’s not true.
Word Count: 500
Written For: Prompt # 450 - Past Challenges Revisited 127 – 160 at slashthedrabble, using Prompt # 150: Fake.
Disclaimer: I don’t own FAKE, or the characters. They belong to the wonderful Sanami Matoh.
“I’m not like you, Dee, I’m completely straight!” Even when he kept repeating those words, Ryo knew deep down that his work partner didn’t believe him. Why would he? Dee had kissed him often enough already to know that despite his protests to the contrary, Ryo couldn’t prevent his traitorous body from responding. Even if he started out trying to push Dee away it was never long before he started pulling the other man closer instead, clinging to him as if he might otherwise drown.
The way Dee made him feel, that might not be too far from the truth; at moments like that, Dee filled Ryo’s senses, making him light-headed and giddy, breathless, his heart pounding and his legs like jelly. It was impossible for Ryo to even think straight with Dee’s lips on his, and it was all he could do to maintain enough presence of mind to keep Dee’s hands from straying too far. If he let his partner get away with too much, Ryo knew he’d be lost for sure.
‘I’m a fake,’ he thought. ‘My entire adult life I’ve let everyone believe I’m straight, done everything I could to keep up that pretence, even though I’ve known all along it’s not true, and now I’m not even sure why. What does it matter if people know I’m gay? What am I so afraid of? Prejudice? Discrimination? It was different when I was at school, seeing other kids being picked on, but now I’m a cop, I’ve been well trained in self-defence; I can take care of myself. Why do I still deny the truth even when it’s staring me in the face?’
That desk officer he met when he first started work at the 27th Precinct, the pretty redhead, Janet. She’d been interested, and he’d all but agreed to take her out for dinner sometime, but he’d never gotten around to arranging a date. He’d gone upstairs, reported to the Chief, been assigned as Dee’s partner, and that was that.
Even though he kept pushing Dee away, rejecting his advances, Ryo knew by now that the reason he wasn’t dating anyone, and hadn’t since meeting his partner, was because the attraction he felt towards the gorgeous black-haired, green-eyes detective was so strong he couldn’t even pretend to be interested in anyone else, least of all a woman.
So what was stopping him from giving in to Dee? That silly fear of losing himself? Dee had such a forceful personality it would be easy to get swept away. What if Dee wasn’t sincere? What if, when he got what he wanted, he just dumped Ryo and moved on to the next conquest. Was that likely? Two years as partners and Ryo was sure that despite all the times women, and men, had propositioned Dee, he’d never accepted.
Everything about the way Dee acted towards Ryo told him his partner wasn’t interested in anyone else. Maybe it was time Ryo stopped faking and admitted he was gay.